It's easy to make the mistake of blaming God for what men do.

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Take THAT Anxiety!!!

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Something that not many people know about me is that I have dealt with anxiety and panic.  I have been told that it is unusual for panic to surface so late in life, but I experienced my first panic issue in my early forties.  I knew immediately what it was, and I sought the help of a doctor.  I also devoured a number of books and listened to relaxation tapes.  I practiced breathing exercises.  I took the initiative and brought the situation under my control.  I took pride in the fact that the doc prescribed Xanax, and I only ever took it two or three times--and that was half a pill.  I hated the feeling it gave me, kind of like being a zombie. There is a misnomer about such attacks.  Perhaps panic is not the best description of what actually occurs. I saw a reporter on the TV a few nights ago.  They showed a clip of him in the midst of a panic attack while reporting live.  He looked down and appeared confused.  He stumbled over...
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66

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It is 4:50AM. I have hellacious acid reflux. I have consumed too many antacids. My rem ai ning option is to sit upright for a while with a cup of tea. I think it is helping. Chemo yesterday. I am now seeing a pattern to the first day of a cycle: i ncreasing fatigue and headache on the way home. Terrible headache and fatigue by the time we get home. Now reflux which is intense even for a seasoned GERD veteran like me. While lying in bed, it occurred to me that my body feels a bit like Route 66. Not the famous one. The infamous one. People who live near DC will know what I am talking about. Bill and I traverse this road to reach Georgetown University Hospital, where I am receiving treatment. I have lived in the DC area for decades, and I have never seen 66 not under construction. I am sure I never will. But, there is presently a new level of chaos which seems to have no limits. Early in the mornings, on our 90-minute drives (on good days), I am typically asleep by the time we are a...
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Vacation Nevertheless

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In April, we had planned a trip to Florida. For numerous reasons, including my recent diagnosis, we couldn't go. We had taken a trip there exactly one year prior. That trip was cut short as my mother had become very ill and entered hospice care in my home. But we recently rescheduled April's bamboozled travels. And, for the past several weeks, I have been very skillfully planning my execution of all that needed doing to pull it off this time. PSC makes a person tired. All. The. Time. But we got it all done, and we left the house at 4AM yesterday. I drove some of the way in the morning, but my husband did most of it. Thankfully. He and my son understand how I am and what this does to me. And they didn't complain about my falling asleep for much of the last leg of the drive. It looked like sleeping, but it felt like a cross between drunk, hungover, and dead. Other people with this disease know what I mean.    We arrived at this beautiful little rental home last evening....
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